Me, meditation and a work in progress (without much progress)

I know the benefits of meditation and I’m in awe of those of you with a regular “practice”.

I’ve investigated every form of meditation (or many). I went to a transcendental meditation info session but found it too cultish. I’ve done online courses but often look at how much time is left…I mean the computer is right there. Today, I attended a group meditation at MOMA, the Museum of Modern art.

My friend suggested the idea and the photos online showed people on cushions in front of beautiful artwork or gazing out at the sculpture garden. When I arrived at the museum, we were told to go “down two flights” which seemed odd. “I’m already claustrophobic” my friend told me. We followed the crowd to the theatre at the museum. It was dark, we were in seats, there was a photo of artwork called “Radius” on the stage’s screen. I was anti already.

The founder of Flavorpill took the stage introduced our teacher (who had a cushion by the way). She told us close our eyes and place our hands in our laps. She didn’t tell everyone to silence their phones and so regularly there were beeps and gongs and all other annoying phone sounds. Next, she talked about belly breath. I still don’t think I’m 100% sure what belly breath is- deep breaths? My mind drifted off to dissecting what that term means. Then Amy, I think that was her name, explained how to count your breath and she suggested exhaling for longer than you inhale. That’s probably old news for those of you meditation pros but I found that helpful yet difficult.

I think teacher preference is personal. I decided midway through belly breathing that Amy was a little annoying or not inspirational enough although that probably stemmed from my frustration. I was frustrated that I was thinking about what to get my father in law for his birthday. I was frustrated that I was frustrated with the subway rumbling and the museum noise.

Before I paint a completely negative picture, there were a few glimmers of hope. First, some of the affirmations or concrete ideas resonated with me. “Think about the best version of today, or the best for you or your family.” And by the time Amy told us to open our eyes, after doing some weird rubbing our hands together and placing them over our eyes, I couldn’t believe a half hour had passed. I left the museum feeling more positive. I’m not sure if that’s because the sun was shining and I got a taxi OR if it was due to the meditation. I’m not done with meditation. I feel like the people who take 10 hours to finish a marathon. They still finish, right? As for my friend, I texted asking if she'd go again. "Probably not again for Moma or any meditation but glad I went and always great to see you".

My actual family vacation versus the fantasy, social media version

We all know how a trip presents on social media is starkly different from how it really is. 

Speaking of social media, in my fantasy I'd be the person who disconnects when away, focuses on what’s in front of me and leaves the rest at home.

One day on vacation I went 9am-2pm without social media and it was a challenge. I pretty much posted the whole trip.

In my fantasy, my kids would try every new food with gusto.

In reality, my son almost threw up tasting poké and I think he had fries with everything 

In my fantasy, I'd feel better physically finishing the trip after being away and eating well. 

I did eat well -lots of salad and ceviche but cocktails, not enough water and constant restaurant food makes a bathing suit not as much fun.

In my fantasy, I'd be happy and relaxed while away but truthfully, when I relax, I have anxiety about things I should be doing and I was away with 5 family members.

In my fantasy, 3 generations away sounded like a dream. The truth is managing expectations of people ages 13-83 is kind of a nightmare. 

Don't get me wrong, I love to travel and explore. I love the things that go wrong (um NEVER go to a luau) as much as things that take your breath away (helicopters, who knew?) but I wanted to assure you that life isn't all margaritas and beaches- as great as that would be...but it's still damn good.

Has Barbara Streisand gained the "Trump 20"?

Impossible to find an inelegant photo of Streisand eating, I tried.

 “Donald Trump made me gain weight.” This was tweeted by Babs (and I read it in the Post so it must be true). She also mentioned pancakes after the morning news and more pancakes when Trump accused Obama of tapping his phones. I know Foodtrainers is smack in the center of Democity but what the Post referred to as “POTUS belly” we’ve started calling the Trump 20 (most of our clients haven’t hit 20 pounds but we still have 1411 days left according to this killer calendar). Typically, people are affected by stressors and emotions in their lives and these vary from person to person. Not since 9/11 have I seen much of my client base experiencing this widespread malaise.

One client, who I hadn’t seen in some time emailed, “So I've just been dealing with PTSD (Post Trump Stress Disorder) with bread and chocolate. This does not help the resistance!” No, it doesn’t. An yes, all Foodtrainees are this smart and funny. Especially when things feel shitting we don’t need another reason to be unhappy. So, I have an idea. Let’s have a look at Trump’s favorite foods:

Chips-specifically Lays, fried and processed like…

Diet Coke-fake and bad for you

Angus beef- always grain fed not grass fed, in other words not what the cows should be eating

Cookies-he likes Oreos- note, there’s black and white in the cookie but no sign of Mexicans.

Maybe, the Resistance Diet is shunning Trump’s foods. No chips (pita chips are chips), soda, non grass fed beef or cookies. Carolyn says our sales of Natural Calm are way up, I suggest double dosing. Cheers!

And I realize there could be a blog reader or two who voted for Donald, I still love you. Just think, you have one fewer reason to gain weight. 

Seven Non-Sweet, Satisfying Snacks

This is a guest post from Stephanie Black. Steph has worked with Foodtrainers in many capacities, most recently as a researcher for my alleged second book. You can find Steph on Insta and twitter @stephgetsfood.

February, the month of heart shaped candy — oops, I mean the month of love — has come to an end. I am a chocolaholic to my core (“Chocolate” was my Bat Mitzvah theme…), but even I am ready to take a break from sweets. Speaking of “breaks,” Spring Break is around the corner, making this the ideal time to start cutting back on sugar. With that said, here are seven non-sweet yet satisfying snacks that this chocolaholic swears by.

1.    Cottage Cheese with Sriracha: During my dietetic internship, a fellow intern told me about this combo. I was skeptical at first, but now it is my absolute favorite snack. For extra health points, opt for Good Culture probiotic cottage cheese

2.    Simple Mills Crackers: these flavorful crackers need no partner/topping. They’re made from almond flour so it’s a crunchy snack with staying power (not easy to find). Just make sure to portion out your serving ahead of time to avoid over-crackering. And these can be purchased online from the Foodtrainers' shop.

3.    Epic Jerky: Between their bars and bites, this jerky brand is one of the few that I trust to taste great without converting my body into the Dead Sea. Honorable mention to VT Smoke and Cure and New Primal jerkys.

4.    Snack Pizza: These fiber-filled crispbreads serve as the perfect vehicle for any healthy topping. Foodtrainers’ current favorite is combining organic string cheese and Applegate pepperoni for a snack pizza-yes! Check out this post from Carolyn for some more Orgran inspo.  

5.    Creative crudité-it’s a good idea to have a container of cut veggies on hand at all times. To spice up your veggie snack, cut up jicama and top with a squeeze of lime and pinch of cayenne. OR buy a bottle of this (a great way to spice up margaritas too…Lauren added that, I am trying to stick to the subject!). 

6.   Pickles If you’re not already on the fermented food train, hop on board. Be sure to choose pickles that are fermented (not all pickles are). We’re fans of Bubbies brand but there’s a whole world of fermented veggies it’s hard not to find at least one kind you’ll love. 

7.    Bean dip move over hummus, have you seen the Go-Dip snack packs? These, no sugar added, gluten free, kosher, vegan (yes!) beauties are super flavorful bean dips with puffed nori chips. These are great for travel, post workout or any time really.

Stay calm, and non-Sweet snack on.

What are your favorite, non-sweet snacks?